fb first world meme
This is the face of seeking External Validation

 

 

Wanting to cull my social media footprint to a manageable level, I decided on the ambitious task of  lowering the number of my Fb friends to just below Dunbar’s number ( which is 150 friends). While easy in theory, it was molasses to bring about into practice.

I want others to be spared the headache of going through the entire process I had to, so here’s a framework to quickly go through a first pass curation of your online relationships.

You can use it, with appropriate modifications, for Instagram & Twitter too.

Just go through the checklist below & unfriend anyone that meets the criteria.

 

Checklist
  • Mark themselves safe in Mumbai “floods”
  •  Have pictures taken using selfie sticks
  •  Compulsively share fb memories to make themselves feel better about getting older
  •  Two words: food pics
  •  Check in every time they eat out
  •  Share cat videos
  •  Are registered as blood donors on Facebook yet demonstrate no inclication towards donating blood irl
  •  Shill their fake handbag “business” excessively
  •  Suffer from “me me me” syndrome
  •  Share no posts where you actually learn something about our wonderful and fascinating world
  •  People who make you go ‘who the fuck is this’?
  • Share shitty buzzfeed links
  •  Excessively political
  •  People you haven’t spoken to in 3 years or more
  •  20-year-old unemployed humanities students sharing their own insights into government economic policies & world politics
  •  Any people left over if you’re still over Dunbar’s number
Take a deep breath. That’s the smell of freedom.
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